Air Force Squawks: Pilots note
problems with aircraft, the crews take care of them. |
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You need a pilot's license even to do Taxi tests,
just park the 747 here... |
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They put a parking brake in the cockpit for a
reason... |
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Salute means launch AIRCRAFT, not missile! |
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Super Chicken! The British borrow NASA's windshield testing gun... |
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Boeing sponsored rafting adventure!
Wups! |
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Aircraft to aircraft antics & pranks on the radio |
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Actual communications between pilots & the tower |
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You might be a Redneck Pilot if....Don't be
surprised if you fit these descriptions! |
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Chicken Road-Crossing & United States Air Force
reactions |
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Darwin Awards: Better known as the "Stupid" award. |
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| US Air Force
Pilot Squawks |
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Each
aircraft is an individual. Therefore, after every flight, pilots make
notes of anything odd or that needs fixing. These "Squawks" are
problem listings that pilots generally leave for maintenance crews to
fix before next flight. Here are some actual maintenance
complaints submitted by US Air Force
pilots and the replies from the
maintenance crews.
(P)=PROBLEM
(S)=SOLUTION
(P) Left inside main tire
almost needs replacement
(S) Almost replaced left inside
main tire
(P) Test flight OK, except
autoland very rough
(S) Autoland not installed on
this aircraft
(P) #2 Propeller seeping prop
fluid,
(S) #2 Propeller seepage normal
- #1 #3 and #4 propellers lack normal seepage
(P) Something loose in cockpit
(S) Something tightened in
cockpit
(P) Evidence of leak on right
main landing gear
(S) Evidence removed
(P) Helmet volume unbelievably
loud
(S) Volume set to more
believable level
(P) Dead bugs on windshield
(S) Live bugs on order
(P) Autopilot in "altitude hold
mode" produces a 200 fpm descent
(S) Cannot reproduce problem on
ground
(P) IFF inoperative
(S) IFF always inoperative in
OFF mode
(P) Friction locks cause
throttle levers to stick
(S) That's what they're there
for
(P) Number three engine seems
to be missing
(S) Engine found on right wing
after brief search
(P) Aircraft handles funny
(S) Aircraft warned to
straighten up, "fly right" and be serious
(P) Target Radar hums
(S) Reprogrammed Target Radar
with the words |
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| Boeing 747
Taxi Test Gone Bad |
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Mechanics were taxiing the B747 after making some minor repairs on it
when this happened. The pucker factor must be extremely high during
this incident. Apparently the mechanics only started the outboard
engines (1 and 4). They soon found out the hydraulic pumps that
operate the brakes are only on the inboard engines (2 and 3). I think
a lot of that damage will buff right out at the body shop.
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| Parking
Brake? Nah, don't need it |
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This
accident happened at Parafield Airport (Just outside RAAF Base
Edinburgh South Australia). An un-crewed light aircraft with engine
running "broke" its chocks and powered through the apron, damaging 9
other parked aircraft. The University's School of Aviation aircraft
were amongst those damaged.
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LAUNCH! Woah.... Look out! |
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This US Navy F/A-18 Hornet had just trapped on his carrier when the
cable brought his speed from 150mph to zero in 2.2 seconds...
unfortunately, his Sidewinder missile did not have it's own hook and
continued on down the deck at 150mph and then began it's new life as a
Sonar Buoy.
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